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The Doctor is IN
Ford took a bite of curry beef, then a sip of Thai tea.
Jake swirled a few noodles around his fork, then popped them into his mouth.
Ford scooped some more rice onto his plate and covered it in curry sauce.
Jake took another bite of noodles, then a sip of Pepsi.
Ford hunted through the sauce for another mushroom.
Jake twirled more noodles around a fork and raised it to his mouth.
"You two make me ver' nuts!" the Queen shouted, breaking the tense silence. "Why you two so quiet?"
"No reason," Ford said.
"We're fine," Jake added.
"Ah," the Queen said, shaking her finger. "You two have fight. Now you mad. I say you go give him kiss."
"We're not having a spat," Ford said. "Jake's just a boyscout, that's all."
"And Chris is a sloppy detective," Jake added.
"A sloppy detective with a near perfect record."
"Yeah," Jake said, still twirling his noodles. "Through no fault of your own. You stumble over everything. If clues had teeth they'd bite you in the ass."
"Hey," Ford snapped. "I know how this city works and I get the job done."
"You know how the city works but you don't know how a car works?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means you drive like Mario Andretti. I'm surprised you haven't killed someone yet."
"I'm a safe driver!"
"You're a nutcase!"
"Hey! Hey!" Lorna said, walking over to their table. "Do I have to send you two to your rooms?"
"No," Ford said, rising from his chair and kissing her hello. "Jake and I are just discovering why you shouldn't date people you work with."
"What's this?" Lorna said, gesturing to Ford's plate. "You couldn't wait for us before ordering?"
"It was Phuong's fault," Ford protested. "She brought us The Usual before we had a chance to tell her no."
"Sure, blame me," The Queen said.
"Where's Mim?"
"Outside, having a cigarette."
"Ah," Ford said. "One bad habit I don't miss."
"Listen!" Fran shouted, walking into the dining room of the Skai Hai Thai. Jake, Ford, and Phuong all swiveled in their chairs to see who she was yelling at. Her face was red, Ford imagined steam jetting out of her ears, and she was holding a phone in her left hand while her right made comical pokes and jabs in the air. "I don't give a damn how much trouble it is. You're the one who screwed up and I'm not paying for it!"
"What's up with her?" Ford said, leaning over to Lorna as she sat down.
"Her realtor was supposed to have the paperwork filed by the fifteenth. He didn't. So now she's stuck with a higher tax rate and her contractor is charging her extra for having to wait."
"No!" Mim shouted, throwing herself into a chair. "No, don't you dare put me on... dammit. He put me on hold."
"Wait," Jake said. "Realtor? Contractor? What's going on?"
"Mim bought a warehouse by Aqua Vista."
"That gray one on China Basin and fifteenth?"
"That's the one," Fran said. She looked at her phone, hissed at it, then folded it up and threw it in her purse. "Can I have a Tsingtao, Phuong? I need alcohol and Lorna's driving."
"What are you doing with a warehouse?"
"I'm turning it into a restaurant."
"Oh, right on," Jake replied. "What kind of food?"
"If I knew that," Fran said, "then I'd know what to call it."
"You don't even have a name yet?"
"Girl Harbor," Ford offered.
"That wasn't funny the first time you said it," Fran said.
"I still like 'The Vorpal Fork,'" Lorna said. "Has a nice ring to it."
"Yeah, but I'm trying to avoid Lewis references," Fran replied, looking at the menu. She glanced up from the menu and noticed Ford and Jake's food. "Hey, how come they ordered already? They couldn't wait for us?"
"In a hurry, apparently," Lorna huffed.
"Well, I am in a hurry," Ford said. "I actually do have to leave in about fifteen minutes."
"Leave?" Lorna asked. "Where to?"
"I'll tell you later. I just have an appointment I can't miss."
"He's getting 'Lorna' tattooed on his ass," Jake said.
"I am not. Shut up."
"I bet he's going to see a shrink," Fran laughed.
"I'm not going to see a shrink. Stop it."
"You made an appointment to see the force psych?" Lorna asked. "Good for you."
"I'm not seeing a shrink!" Ford protested.
"Ok, ok," Lorna said, holding her hands up. "Relax. I won't bug you about seeing a shrink."
"I'm not seeing a shrink," Ford repeated, an exasperated tone to his voice.
"You can relax," Dr. Gardner said.
"Sorry," Ford replied, making spiders with his fingers. "I've just never been to a shrink before."
She had a serious tone that reminded Ford of Bea Arthur. Her hair was dark brown and looked natural, but her face had a worn quality that made her age difficult to guess. Something about that made Ford uncomfortable.
"Seeing a psychiatrist makes you afraid?"
"Well, I'm not afraid, I've just never done this before. I'm nervous."
"I see," she said. Ford could here her scribbling something down on a notepad. "And what do you think is going to happen?"
"I dunno," Ford said, pushing the padding of the couch beneath his hands. "You'll electroshock me? Maybe shoot me up with powerful drugs if I fail the inkblot test?"
"Why don't we start small and work our way up to electroshock," Dr. Gardner replied. "Let's start at the beginning."
"Which is?"
"Well, why don't you start by telling me about Frank Simonyi?"
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